Monday, August 2, 2010

Emails and Pleasantries and Courtesy. Oh My!

A friend of mine (hi, Rita!) has a very good policy of not answering emails until she can take enough time to truly communicate her thoughts. Just as one would in a letter, you know.

You hear often that there is no way to be pleasant in emails or to communicate tone.

That is not really true, if one thinks about it. It is just an excuse for not spending the few extra minutes to take the trouble to add an extra sentence or phrase to make sure that you are not coming off as curt or rushed. In turn, that makes sure that the person reading your email doesn't feel as if their question is stupid or they are just idiots in general.  For heaven's sakes, people, a lot of the time all you have to do is toss in a smiley face here or there.

I would rather wait for someone to be sure they have taken the time to communicate properly than to be made to feel stupid or needy or as if I shouldn't have written at all. Despite my somewhat famous speed in responding to emails, for certain correspondence I will often wait a day or two for that very reason. I want to pay the writer the courtesy of responding with full attention. I have received such winning emails from podcast listeners or blog readers who manage to make very good points in very nice ways. I always appreciate it. So I try to do the same. I am sure I succeed only part of the time. But I like to try anyway.

3 comments:

  1. Tante Leonie8/3/10, 10:39 AM

    Thanks for this, Julie.

    Now, if I could only remember to extend it to remember to think a minute before I open my mouth and check my heart and tone of voice ....

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  2. We ARE soul sisters! You hit my nail on the head ... :-)

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  3. I kind of agree. Except that I tend to be a perfectionist and sometimes let the perfect be the enemy of the good. I find that if I wait more than a day or two, it will be weeks or months before I reply. If ever. So I think I have to find a balance between finding time to craft a careful and thorough response and not finding time at all.

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